my lame life

My English professor told me this was an A-plus essay, I thought I could do better though. Rushed through it. Thought it was funny though, so I am posting it for ya'll to enjoy.

Something in the Water
By: Dawn Erbstoesser

Attention Deficit Disorder and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder have become an epidemic amongst the youth of America. A.D.D. and A.D.H.D. have become a threat to early childhood development, and need to be treated as such. We as a nation need to put an end to these disabilities to make education possible, so all our children may become productive, successful members of society.
Our first step in the battle against these problems is to begin placing small child doses of the drug Ritalin in our nation’s water supply. Ritalin is a drug that is used to treat and control A.D.D. and A.D.H.D. and has been widely used for decades. Placing this drug in water, something our children consume on a daily basis, will begin to treat the disability and parents will notice a remarkable change in their behavior.
Years ago our government added fluoride to our water supply for chemical treatment, a positive side effect of fluoride is increased protection from tooth decay. Doctors have been encouraging mothers for years to feed their children tap water instead of bottled water to protect their teeth from childhood cavities. Our children now can benefit from the addition of Ritalin within their water.
At first the change will be gradual. Children will be more attentive and calm. It will become easier for teachers and daycare workers to address their classes without the constant worry of interruption or disciplinary issues. Test scores and grades will begin to rise.
Children and adults will begin to drink more water, due to the addictive nature of the drug. No longer will children beg and plead for sugary sodas, which once gave them a quick burst of energy and empty calories. The water will give them increased energy without calories or fat.
We will be able to cut health care costs nationwide by the lowered percentage in obesity. One of the side effects of the drug Ritalin is a decrease in appetite. The health care industry will see a drop in Heart Disease, Diabetes, and costly Gastric Bypass surgeries. With the added kick of energy provided by the water, people who could not motivate themselves to exercise will find it difficult to sit still. Our government can stop spending billions on fighting obesity and funnel taxpayer dollars elsewhere.
Adults throughout the nation will begin to see a change at work as well. Workers will be more focused and detail oriented. They will accomplish tasks in half the time, sparking a rise in production and development. American companies will no longer struggle to compete within the global marketplace, they will dominate. Once the work day is stretched to twelve hours instead of the average eight, employees will find themselves almost doubling their incomes and have increased spending power.
We will no longer be a nation of lazy, overweight, and unmotivated underachievers. Our new “doped up” nation will not care about the small everyday annoyances like sleep or family time. Our children will work like machines, becoming the strong emotionless future workforce this nation needs to thrive. Enjoy a clean, crisp, and slightly medicated glass of water; we’ll take care of the rest.

Bibliography
“Methylphenidate.” Wikipedia. Online. Internet. May 17 2008
“Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.” Wikipedia. Online. Internet. May 16 2008

this year was nuts! we had skot's family over xmas day. cash was on present overload. at one point he was on the floor covered in wrapping paper and surrounded by toys, yet still begging, "More presents?!" he is currently playing with the thomas the train set that his uncle dj bought for him. he recieved 2 gifts from dale's brother that i am not happy about....a nerf disc shooter and a nerf blow gun that shoots suction cup darts. how many times must i tell you all....NO WEAPONRY!!! i was fortunate enough to shoot a dart that hit skot in the temple, made the coolest noise too.

Cash's big gifts included a computer, which is actually my old one, just stripped down with new monitor, and the fisher price smart cycle. i am trying to teach cash how to pedal it. skot got him a sweet rc car which he loves. i bought him a few games, candyland and chutes and ladders.

i bought skot 2 books, steve colbert's new one, and steve martin's semi bio' and of course some hair goo. he got me the first season of nip tuck! so happy cause i never get to watch it anymore. one of the best and dirtiest shows on television.

unexpected gift for me was a laptop. second hand, mom bought dale a new one. so now i can veg out while upstairs with cash, and also i can have some privacy and use it in my room.

my mom gave me money, she couldn't remember what phone i wanted, and dale bought me a new video card for the pc. yay wow will look so much better now.

was a good holiday for the most part. lots of stress getting it together, but was a good result. miss my dad, wish he could have been here. it sucks only seeing him once a year. we talk on the phone almost weekly, just isn't the same though. wish he was around to see cash more. cash looks so much like him.

on a final note i get my stitch out tonight, excited cause now it hurts whenever it moves. so hard trying to shower one handed. still proud of my decision to stab myself instead of slicing the little girl's cheek. although i am sure that if i did, next time she might sit a bit more still.

i hope everyone else's holidays were great. even those i still hold ill feelings towards. my feelings are still ill, but we are all human.

feel like i am going to explode, so many things going on, too much drama, emotion etc. I have been through the ringer the last few weeks. I feel like I am mute. no one hears me screaming sometimes. just vaguely venting.

Here is an obit of a girl I went to beauty school with. She was one of the friendliest people i have ever met.





Tina Marie Burns
TINA MARIE BURNS Washburn, Wisconsin Tina Marie Burns, age 23, passed away on Friday, September 14, 2007 in Merrillville, IN, as the result of an automobile accident. She was born on September 13, 1984, in Stevens Point, WI, the daughter of Terry Burns of Washburn, WI, and Andrea (nee Henderson) Burns, both of Washburn, WI and formerly of Merrillville, IN. Tina attended Washburn High School and was a graduate of the Regis School of Cosmetology, Burnsville, MN where she was chosen to speak at her class graduation celebration. She loved horses and horsemanship, participating in many Bayfield County 4-H Horse shows, earning numerous trophies and ribbons. She was a member of Washburn FCCLA, helping to organize blood drives and a daffodil sale benefiting the American Cancer Society. She thoroughly enjoyed the outdoors, fishing, and camping. Tina loved people and brought her infectious energy, bright smile and good humor to all her endeavors. She is survived by her father, Terry (Claire Duquette) Burns of Washburn, WI; her mother, Andrea Burns of Washburn, WI; 1 brother, Derrick Burns; 1 sister, Kari Burns; 1 step-sister, Aimee Strzok, all of Washburn, WI; many aunts, uncles, cousins, and a niece. She was preceded in death by her grandparents, Tom and Vern Burns of Merrillville and Jack and Dorothy Henderson of Merrillville. Memorial services Tuesday, Sept. 18, 2007, 6 p.m. at Mountain Funeral Home, 220 - 3rd Ave. E., Ashland, WI 54806. Friends are invited to meet with the family at the funeral home prior to the service from 4-6 p.m. Cremation at Burns Funeral Home Crematory, Crown Point will precede the service. In lieu of flowers, memorials may be directed to the American Cancer Society or an animal shelter of your choice.
Published in the Post-Tribune from 9/15/2007 - 9/16/2007.

my careers.... (ala career crusing)

1. director
2. director of photography
3. hairstylist
4. makeup artist
5. music teacher
6. picture framer
7. esthetician
8. costume designer
9. cashier
10. art director

yay my job is #3 on the list! woot!

just talked to my dad. I feel a lot better about my current situation for now. He is one of those people I can always bounce choices off of to see if they are stupid or not. He is one of those that can be both supportive and honest with me. He also reminds me to take time out for myself too. He asked me what I do with my time off, I really had no answer. Other than the occasional night out, (where I make an ass out of myself) I stay home. I don't really have any hobbies. I work, take care of my son, and watch tv or play video games. He didn't like that answer. I need to make a commitment to try to take care of myself as well. I have to balance all of the different things in my life, without neglecting any of them. I hate this part of life.

Anyways new goals....

Get out of mom's before cash is in kindergarten.
be financially independent
take better care of myself, so I can take better care of cash
salon manager's license
get boobs

I told my boss on saturday that I was leaving. She was pissed at me for awhile. Part of me thinks she still is. I hope she and I can still be friends. We get along so well and I loved working with her.

Totally freaking out about wednesday. Got a new outfit and shoes. Now just have to eat, sleep, and dream this haircut I have to do. It is a bit ballsy, just my style though. Razor cutting and sculpting. Lots of texture. Working on someone I have never cut before. I know I can do it, it is just hoping that I don't pee my pants while I do it.

I won't die if I don't get it. I have another job offer already, just really want this one, wanted it since beauty school. Went for Trade at the time because it was a sure thing. Either way, both are great money. WAY more money than I see now.

going to the fair tomorrow.

I found a model!!! yay!!! one of my buddies from school is my victim for wednesday. I have possibly the biggest job interview of my life. I am excited and terrified. There will be people who get about a hundred bucks for haircut judging my work. Yes I will be peeing my pants.

This is why I don't read people's twitters that are not on my friends list. I guess they are there for a reason.




Finally! I found a GOOD hair stylist and colorist! No more fried hair and shitty hair cuts! 09:12 AM August 11, 2007

I think my heart stopped briefly today when it happened. Standing there I watched them fall. I lurched forward trying to catch them.....nope. They hit the ground, my $200 shears. I freaked out. They are notched in the front, won't close smoothly anymore. I am sure they are ruined. I cannot see how sharpening them will help the situation any. My next opportunity to purchase new ones without being bent over by a supply house will be at heartland beauty expo in october. For now I am back to using my cheap school shears' and my hugely expensive 7.5" shears.

The show was not as good as I thought it would be, I liked it, but then again i do hair. Ken Paves did a hair show in the rotunda at MOA to support our store and to launch his hair extension line with Jessica Simpson. The hair sold better saturday, after he left. He is a damn hot gay man though. wanted to jump up on stage and grab his butt.

I got temporary clip in extensions. Must say I look fucking hot with long hair! They get annoying after awhile though. Lots of clips and hair in my head. they look very natural, just wish they felt that natural.

Saturday was a bit crazier. The morning was slow. spent most of the day in the front window, curling and flat ironing my boss' hair. The end of the day got crazy, in the span of 4 hours I did about 200 bucks worth of services. thought I was going to die! Came home and collapsed at about 9:30.

I know I am going to piss off some, but at the moment i dont care.


Why do people feel the need to lie to me? Straight to my face. To everyone who knew what was going on and said nothing, fuck you! Can't believe you never said anything. This is huge! Bigger than who I choose to make out with in a parking lot!

If you make a promise or a deal with me, keep it. Don"t fuck around on the side and make sure that I am keeping my end of it up. For that you are a lying, sleazy bastard. When I ask you to your face if you are still holding true to the deal, you lie, again.

Telling me that your supposed "friend" is not babysitting your child, yet come to find out that she is watching your son the majority of the time and in actuality she is your "girlfriend" is not ok. Not in any way! In fact it is supremely fucked up.

And just so everyone reading this knows, I am not jealous. I could give a fuck! It pisses me off that I was told by people involved that i was crazy or psycho. It makes me mad cause you lied, to my face, more than once. It makes me mad that you brought that around my son!! Knowing about how strongly i felt about it, you still did it!!!

you tell me that you respect me, that i am one of the strongest, smartest women you know, I now know you were just playing me. You don't respect me. You don't give a rats ass about my feelings. You never did. If you respected me you would be honest with me and respect my feelings. Not let me find out second hand via text and twitter. Lying about shit she wrote about you two on lj and twitter.

Egging me on to swallow my pride and make nice with your secret girlfriend, me not knowing that the two of you are lying to me and everyone?

asking me for gas money? what the hell was that? complaining that he asks you for money? fuck you! The both of you!

I am tired of all of this shit. Lesson learned here. Always trust your instincts no matter how many people tell you that you are paranoid or crazy. They are right most of the time.

I'm okay, was trapped at the mall of america as per usual

I had a really nice guy in my chair a couple days ago...

He and I talked about parenthood and I told him about being a mom and how awesome it really is. He told me about his 2 newborns and that they were in the nicu at children's hospital in minneapolis.

I found out tonight that this is him...

http://www.kare11.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=258531

I get it. I understand. crawling back into hole from which I crawled out of. Since you have decided to slam me in public forum I will say my goodbyes in the same manner. It's been real....